Lessons I’ve Learned in Leadership and Life - Public Speaking
Public Speaking
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about lessons I’ve learned in leadership and life and pivotal moments that kind of get you to where you’re supposed to be. I just wanted to share them with you because I want you to know that you’re not alone, we’re all human, we all have fears and insecurities, and what doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
Early in my career, I worked in the brokerage industry and managed the stock option plans and administration. We would have monthly team meetings where the brokers would speak and one afternoon my manager came up to me nonchalantly and said “Monica so and so is sick and I need you to talk about stock options.” I became immediately nauseous. I thought I was gonna throw up. I could feel the heat rising and my ears and face were hot and beet red and I started to cry. I said” I can’t “ and he said “what do you mean you can’t” and I said ” I just can’t.” He walked away very annoyed and disappointed with me and believe me, I was annoyed and disappointed with myself. I thought to myself, I have to get over this fear of public speaking if I’m ever going to advance in my career. So, I took a Dale Carnegie class on public speaking. I was the only female in the class and every week we would have to talk about something different. In the final class we needed to speak about something very personal. It was very awkward and uncomfortable for me, but I did it. I was like, OK , I’ve conquered this and I’m ready to go… well you would think but I wasn’t quite ready to go. When I had to do my very first official presentation in the real world, I was so prepared, I practiced in my head 1,000 times, I knew the subject matter backwards and forwards and I got on stage and I started to speak and I got so excited and spoke so fast that I didn’t breathe and l gasp for air and actually burped very loudly and it was humiliating. In hindsight, I’m grateful I didn’t pass out. But let me tell you, you gotta keep going.
I wanted to share some of the tips that I’ve learned over the years when it comes to public speaking. First, If you're being asked to speak, you’re obviously highly regarded and you probably know more than anyone in the room about the topic you’re speaking on. I’m always afraid I’ll get a question I don’t know the answer to. I mean, I’m supposed to be the expert, what if I don't know the answer. Well you know what, I don’t know all the answers, so you say, great question, let me get back to you and you go find the answer and get back them. Here’s some other tips:
Have water within reach, it forces you to take a pause…. and breathe.
Do something with your hands. Hold onto the podium or put your hands in your pocket so you’re not speaking with your hands.
When it comes to notes only have very high-level bullet points. I've tripped up before because I had so many detailed notes, I lost my place and got off track. With bullet points, you can speak naturally and cover everything without getting off track.
Practice out loud! Everything sounds good in your head but you need to say it out loud. I practice in front of anybody who will listen , my family, my dog , my friends, in front of the mirror, because the more you say it out loud the more comfortable and confident you get.
Go into a private place before speaking and stand like superwoman/man in the power pose and just breathe.
Since my very rough start, I have spoken in front of boards and at conferences, I’ve been on panels with fellow experts in my field, I’ve done a live podcast sort of thing, and I even had to go to a professional studio, get my hair and make up done and record a video that was going to be shared with all employees and their families.
Am I an expert public speaker that people lineup around the block to listen to… absolutely not, do I still get nervous- yes! But I am no longer debilitated by it and I know that I will survive.
I love this quote, “ There is no growth in the comfort zone and there is no comfort in the growth zone”. It's so true. Don’t be so hard on yourself, you will get better every time you try something and you will survive!
Thank you so much for listening and Be Well!
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